Wednesday, March 08, 2023

Theodore Lewis Lee Mertz (A Birth Story)...

 Here I am… writing my LAST birth story! 


Theodore Lewis Lee Mertz arrived January 20th, 2023 at 8:44am weighing in at 8 lbs 4 oz and 21” long!


Writing out my kids’ birth stories is one of my favorite things to do. I love trying to remember random details that I can go back and read through when I has forgotten them. Before Theo arrived, I actually read through Will, Cora, and Hazel’s birth stories trying to remember which details belonged to which child. It was wild some of the things I had forgotten and I am so thankful I have them to read back through in years to come. Hopefully each of the kids will appreciate reading how they came into this world too someday.


If you want to read through my past stories, you can follow the links:

Will’s Birth story (this one is EPIC, but trigger warning about traumatic birth)

Cora’s Birth Story

Hazel’s Birth Story (trigger warning because I talk about miscarriage)


This pregnancy was such a sweet gift and pretty early on, I was convinced that this would be my last pregnancy. I have NO DESIRE to have more than 4 kids, but you never know what God is going to put on your heart, and I was open to His desires for our family. In many moments along this pregnancy and birth journey, God confirmed in my heart that I am done! One confirmation was that this was a largely easy pregnancy! At least compared to my last two pregnancies - I had less morning sickness, less aches and pains, and also less anxiety, which was a huge gift. We had a scare in the first trimester where I had a small subchorionic hemorrhage with some spotting, but even during that I feel like I had more peace than fear that we were gonna be ok. Also finding out we were having a boy was another confirmation because my dream had always been to have two boys and two girls and I felt that my bookend boys made our family feel so complete. Then as the last month of pregnancy came and all the discomfort, bad sleep, aching back and joint, and intense braxton hicks… it made me really settle with the fact that I had NO DESIRE to ever be pregnant again.


Through the whole pregnancy it really was so good for me to have the mindset that this was the last pregnancy, because I felt more able to work through the harder and more annoying parts of pregnancy and have the perspective that this was the last time I would ever do this and I wanted to savor what I could and persevere through what seemed daunting. As the end of my pregnancy approached I was ready for his arrival. Both Cora and Hazel came 3 weeks and 2 weeks early respectively, so my Dr and I were convinced we wouldn’t make it until my scheduled c-section. When we discussed the day it would be scheduled Dr. Schwartz actually said “We’ll schedule your c-section just for fun, but I’ll see you at the hospital before then!” haha.


I was 35 weeks on New Years Day and I felt like that was when I started feeling like it could be any day now. I of course didn’t want him to come THAT early, but I felt the urgency to make sure we had everything we needed/wanted to have done before his arrival. We took down Christmas, painted his nursery, put together his crib. I actually packed my hospital bag at 32 weeks because I just needed to know it was ready. Each of my past labors got faster and faster and so I was anxious this one would be even crazy faster and I would risk being fully 10cm when I got to the hospital and miss my c-section window.


As 37 weeks approached I was even more on alert for going into labor. I paid attention to the marker days for when Cora arrived and Hazel arrived, and Cora’s day was 37 weeks and 1 day. I was having regular braxton hicks contractions, but nothing that intensified or stayed regular for longer than an hour. But my Dr. again confirmed that it could be any time. At my 37 week appt, I was just over 1 cm dilated, but that didn’t mean anything with how quickly I could progress. Aaron particularly was hoping I could go as long as I could since he had work stuff that he didn’t want to skip out on for paternity leave. So I took it very easy and when he was home he refused to let me lift a finger.


Now of course I was prepared that this labor could be entirely different than my last. Maybe I would have contractions before my water broke. Maybe my water would break in the middle of the day instead of the middle of the night like the others. Maybe I wouldn’t give birth on a Wednesday like I did with my other 3. Maybe I would make it all the way to 39 weeks and walk into the hospital labor free for my surgery! I had a plan for all instances. 


Thursday evening we went to bed and I got up several times in the night to use the bathroom and as always wondered if my water would break… but sure enough I woke up at 6am and nothing had happened! I got up to start getting ready for the day and when went to the bathroom sure enough my water broke!! I even felt the bubbly pop! Of course I sat there for a bit, not sure if what I felt was real. I waited for a contraction just like my previous labors, but none came. So I decided to go lay down again and see if anything else happened. But as I walked back to the bed, I felt more water and knew this was it! I quickly woke up Aaron and told him it was time! We were both so thankful we had had a full night of sleep! Aaron immediately called his parents and I started gathering up the last minute hospital bag things and changing clothes. Aaron’s parents arrive about 40 min later, and at that point I had only had 2 contractions and while I could tell they were real labor contractions, they weren’t super painful and about 12 - 15 min apart.

I figured since contractions were slow to begin this labor would go slower than the others, so I wasn’t anxious about rushing to the hospital. We decided to wake the kids up and say goodbye to them before leaving to the hospital and we got one last family of 5 picture and one last bump picture!  The kids were SO EXCITED to go to school that day and tell all their friends their baby brother was coming! We told them that when they got home from school we’d call them so they could see sweet Theo!


We left for the hospital and I was surprised that as soon as we hit the road, my contractions went from 10 min apart to 4-5 min apart. By the time we got to the hospital 30 min away (arriving at around 7:30am), they were more like 3 min apart! I distracted myself on the drive with Aaron and I talking about our predictions on his weight. I knew he was going to be a big kid for being over 2 weeks early, so I predicted he’d be 7 lbs 12 oz. (Cora and Hazel were both 7 lbs 6 oz and Will was 8 lbs 2 oz at full term 40 weeks). As we checked in, Aaron had to do everything and answer all the questions because I couldn’t speak much through the pain. I just kept telling myself my c-section would be in probably an hour at most, so I didn’t have to do this long. I also kept telling myself this was the last time! They swiftly got us back to a triage room and we actually walked right by Schwartz who was on her way to another c-section before she was free to do mine. When we to back to the triage room, I actually got a bit frustrated because I changed into my hospital gown and then it felt like 15 min before anyone walked in to check on us or get everything ready. Here I was laboring and no one was checking us in, starting my IV or anything. I started to feel antsy to get stuff going. Finally the nurse came in to check me and I was 5cm dilated and fully effaced. Since Schwartz was in another surgery and wouldn’t be ready for almost an hour, as soon as my IV was in they gave me meds to slow my contractions. I was very thankful for some relief where my contractions were spread out and shorter and less intense for a bit before we went to the OR. The nurse told me if I had waited much longer to come in, I probably would have just had the baby in triage. Which again, with my traumatic birth history with Will, was a terrifying thought because there was no guarantee the baby would have been delivered easily or safely other than by C-section. Speaking of IVs it took them 4 tries to find a vein that would work… which was excruciating. Seriously I think IVs are just as bad as the worst labor contractions! 


One of my favorite moments while waiting in triage that made me giggle was when I got a text from my friend Jessica at around 8am saying her Dr.s appointment had to be rescheduled because Schwartz had an unexpected delivery and she was convince it was me. I laughed so hard because it was!!


Finally the anesthesiologist walked in and I knew it was almost go time! He confirmed Schwartz had finished her other c-section and they were getting my OR ready to go. By the way, I LOVE anesthesiologists! They are always so laid back and both the ones I have had were like our bff in triage and the OR. They are up for casually chatting and their demeanor always puts me at such ease. Plus they have the good drugs that take away my contraction pain! 


Then at around 8:30am we were off and being wheeled to the OR! We got in there and I walked to the table to got prepped for my spinal block. They had to wait through a big contraction, but then the drugs were in and I started feeling instant relief! They took some time prepping me and I was quite entertained by the playlist in the OR. I walked into Sugar Ray’s “Every Morning” which was such an odd song. Obviously NOT Dr. Schwartz’s playlist. (Fun fact, Theo was born while Mariah Cary’s “Fantasy” was playing! Such a fitting moment!). Aaron finally walked in and the surgery started. I always am so amazed how quickly it happens that they make the first cut and then before you know it the OR is filled with baby cries. Theo was born at 8:44am! His sweet little mewing cry was just the sweetest and I cried and cried that he was here! They took him over to the table and from where I was I could watch as they wiped him down and took care of him. They announced his weight and he was 8 lbs 4 oz!! Schwartz was shocked and everyone was so surprised at how big he was for being 2 weeks and 2 days early! I immediately started laughing in surprise and declared to the room “I feel very validated in how uncomfortable I have been!”


The surgery finished up while they cleaned and wrapped up our boy. I had asked for skin to skin, but the nurse was concerned at how cold the OR was and that Theo’s body wouldn’t do well with that. So when Theo was all wrapped up, he was handed off to Aaron and then Aaron brought him over to me. He put his head right next to mine and I could feel his warmth. I kissed him on the cheek and then he turned his little head and puckered his lips to smooch me back! Such a sweet moment. Aaron got lots of snuggles in while they were closing me up and I spent most of the time trying to relax because the medication made me so shaky. The anesthesiologist took pictures of us and before I knew it they has finished up my surgery and I was ready to head to recovery! They put me on the rolling bed and then handed me my baby boy and I snuggled him as they rolled us to recovery! 



I love the recovery room! It might be my favorite part of having a baby! It is so quiet and chill. Only one nurse comes in and out. As we were wheeled into the room, I noticed the clock and it was just about 9:30am. It was so wild to me how the day was already under way! After the c-section my body is still dealing with the affects, so I was cold and shaky, and so I snuggled Theo, started nursing (which he started without issue!! Praise God) and they piled on warm blankets to control our body temperatures. And then Aaron and I spent an hour relaxing, chatting, and recounting how the last nearly 4 hours had unfolded.


Then at around 10:30am they wheeled us to our permanent room. As we were wheeled through the halls they stopped at the Lullaby button! At our hospital every time you have a baby, they have you push a button to play a lullaby throughout the speakers in the hospital. It is such a sweet moment. Aaron and I actually have no memory of doing it with the other kids, but they videoed this moment for us. We continued on to our room and I finally got to fully sit up and get somewhat comfortable with my boppy nursing pillow covering my incision site and getting to fully hold my little boy and really take him in!


Theo was such a perfect mixture of Will/Hazel and Cora! I thought Hazel was a copy and paste of Will when she was born, but Theo even more reminded us of Will, but with Cora’s mouth and chin! I had pictured my whole pregnancy him having dark hair like Cora did (not sure why) and so I was surprised how light it was and how little of it there was! Also, there was definitely no red. He was very much his own self, but so reminiscent of the other kiddos. The Mertz genes are so strong, because regardless he just looks like his daddy! Speaking of Mertz genes, we FaceTimed the kiddos as soon as they were all home from school and up from naps and they were beyond delighted to see their tiny baby! When the camera wasn’t on him and Aaron and I were talking to them, they were quick to ask for the phone to go back on their brother and not us! At one point in the phone conversation I had the phone pointed to Theo and I could also see all the tiny faces of my other kids on the screen and the reality that I had 4 children hit me! I told Aaron to take it in and his eyes got wide and the reality hit him too! So incredibly thankful and also so incredibly surreal and a bit overwhelming.



A bittersweet element of Theo’s arrival was that it happened to be on the same day (just about 11 hours before) my Aunt passed away. She had developed Pneumonia after having surgery for a neck injury and sadly she couldn’t fight it. The week leading up to her passing we had all prayed for her recovery and then that Thursday we knew it was time to let her go. Several family members met at the hospital Thursday evening to be with her and her two sons (my cousins) and as they spent time together they actually discussed what a sweet thing it would be if Theo happened to be born the next day knowing that was when they would be taking her off life support. When I woke up Friday morning and my water broke it was one of the first things I thought about. What a bittersweet thing to have him begin his life while Aunt Etna’s life ended. A reminder that life continues and God can give us great joy in the midst of grief. Aunt Etna would have LOVED Theo and she would have been one of the first people to send a welcome card and come visit us to meet him. She was so incredibly sweet and thoughtful and it was good for my heart to know they shared life together for a little while before Etna went home to heaven.


The remainder of our hospital stay went by rather quickly. There was a piece of me that was itching to get home to my kids, but also a part of me that loved the break from caring for everyone else and instead having others care for me, bring me food, hand me a baby, change that baby’s diaper, while I “relaxed” (I add the quotations because it isn’t true relaxing when you are in pain from surgery, desperate for a hot shower (for the first 24 hours then I took a shower in the jankiest shower, but it felt incredible!), exhausted and unable to really get good sleep, and people coming in and out of your room constantly to check on you or baby). But even in the midst of that, Aaron and I enjoyed the hospital stay and it being just the 3 of us and we would just sit and chat. We mostly spent time recounting all the many memories we had in that hospital. Maybe it was because this was our last birth, or maybe it was because Theo was another boy, but we spent quite a bit of time re-processing Will’s birth (our first birth). You would think 7 years later, it wouldn’t be so raw, but Aaron said that being in the same little waiting room outside the OR as he was during Will’s birth definitely triggered some unpleasant memories and feelings in him. It was healing and sweet to relive some of our hard moments, but also beautifully joyful moments from our 4 births.




Another part of our hospital stay was pain management for me. Since having Hazel, the hospital had changed their drug policy and switched up the pain meds offered to patients. After the harder drugs they gave me before and right after the c-section had worn off, all they offered me was alternating doses of Tylenol and Motrin. After 24 hours of that I felt like I was still in a ton more pain than I should be. When I mentioned this to my day nurse, she offered me a low dose of Oxicodone. But when it came time for another dose 6 hours later, my night nurse didn’t include it when she came. So finally I brought it up to her and she was incredibly hesitant to give it to me. It was such a frustrating thing for me because I felt like I was begging for drugs because I was in pain, which probably signaled to the nurse a red flag to not give me the stronger meds. When she finally relented I felt some relief, but the damage was done and I felt like my last day in the hospital I was perpetually behind the pain and so it was really discouraging. Thankfully once I was home, my doctor had prescribed me the stronger medication and I figured out a timing schedule that helped me feel on top of the pain and gave me the relief I needed!


By the time I was able to be discharged, Aaron and I were ready! We got all packed up and hit the road.




Introducing Theo to our big kids upon returning home was one of the sweetest moments of my life! We brought him in and my in laws had them all sitting on the couch quietly waiting. They all were instantly giggling with delight and excitement! I could see the tears welling up in Will’s eyes and as soon as I sat down, he jumped off the couch and ran into Aaron’s arms and said “I think I’m gonna cry, I’m so happy. I feel so wonderful!” Each one got a turn to hold him with Cora going first and when Will and Hazel had turns, they each sang him the sweetest rendition of “Twinkle Twinkle”. I cried multiple times from shear joy. And just like that we were a family of 6!!


To finish up this rather long birth story, if you’ve made it this far, I’ll give you the stories behind Theo’s name! 


Theodore (Nickname Theo) was actually on our name list for Will and was always in second place. Aaron and I love old fashioned names, and I loved either Theo and Teddy as nicknames. Aaron was on board with the name, but when we officially found out we were having a boy we had a brief hesitation and didn’t want to commit. But then after a few days of throwing out EVERY other boys name we liked, we realized Theodore really was the best one! Theodore means “Gift of God” and we loved that too for our little boy and final baby. We chose Theo as the name we would call him, because we loved that it could stay consistent from childhood to adulthood (Teddy always turns into Ted and we didn’t like that as much). Note: If Theo had been a girl he would have been Margaret or Margot.


Lewis - The first middle name actually took a LONG TIME for us to figure out. We had a list of all our remaining male family names thinking we would use one, but none of them really excited us - George, David, John, Joseph, etc. we rotated through them for ages. Finally I told Aaron one day we should think of other people (not family) we may want to honor in the middle name. Cora’s middle name Jane is after both our favorite author Jane Austen, so I suggested we think of other authors we like… or theologians… or biblical figures… or people personally significant in our lives. Aaron immediately joking suggested “Theodore Clive Sinclair Mertz” After C.S. Lewis. I laughed and then cantered with “Theodore Lewis” and we both looked at each other and our eyes got wide and we just knew that was it! We both LOVE C.S. Lewis and have read nearly all his books and hold many of his passages and quotes dear to our hearts and lives! We also loved that he paralleled Cora’s author middle name. 

Lee actually was chosen before we had settled on Theo. Will has both his middle names after Aaron and my dad’s (James & Randy), so I thought we could honor our mom’s by figuring out how to use their names - Linda Leona and Laurie Dee. I had spent a couple years thinking about it from time to time and thinking of names that combined their first names or middle names or carried the same meanings, etc. I had a whole list on my phone of possible combination names. Combining Leona and Dee to make Lee was the best option! Note: if Theo had been a girl we would have used the combined name Lindrie as a middle name. Isn’t it cute! But definitely sounded too girly in my mind.


So there it is Theodore Lewis Lee Mertz. Our little Theo!

Friday, January 22, 2021

Hazel Mae Kiva Mertz (A Birth Story)

If you haven't read Will or Cora's Birth Stories yet, feel free to click over to them to take a look. I feel that every mother compares her birth stories to one another, that was definitely true of Cora's compared to Will's and even with this one compared to the other two.

Let's start with a little back story and lead up to Hazel's eventual arrival.

*** TRIGGER WARNING - Miscarriage ***

My pregnancy with Hazel was HARD - both physically and mentally/emotionally. I had 2 miscarriages proceeding Hazel's pregnancy and so I carried into this journey a lot of fear and anxiety. My first miscarriage was December 2019 at 9 weeks. We actually knew it was coming for a couple weeks before it actually happened. At 7 weeks we had our first ultrasound and the baby was much smaller than expected. I left that appointment with Aaron sobbing in the parking lot knowing what was coming. My doctor had hope and didn't think much of it assuming my dates were off, but she scheduled another ultrasound for a week later. For a week I held as much hope as I could, but deep down I just knew. At the next ultrasound at 8 weeks it was apparent that I was miscarrying and the baby's heartbeat was nearly gone. Then for another week I waited for my body to do what it needed to do naturally. Sadly it never did and I eventually had to have a D&C. It was traumatic and sad and while I had walked through miscarriage with friends before this and grieved with them, nothing really prepares you for experiencing it yourself. 

When we were able to try again, we got pregnant right away! I felt so much hope because how could God possibly have me miscarry again? The odds were unlikely... and so for 3 days we dreamed of our little one. Then at 6 weeks, I lost that baby too. The process this time was physically easier, but the wounds were deeper and I had a lot more anger and fear... what if a third baby wasn't in the cards for us?

When I got the positive pregnancy test with Hazel, I remember seeing the faint line and mentally shrugging my shoulders... Well, we'll see where this goes...

I had early blood tests to check my hormone levels because of my previous losses and they determined early that my progesterone was dropping, so I needed to take extra progesterone. Thus began the physical wreckage of the first trimester. I felt as sick as I possibly could! Severe nausea from the time I woke up to the time I fell asleep, dizziness and vertigo from the progesterone, extreme exhaustion, and food aversions to literally EVERYTHING! I lived on raisin toast with peanut butter and hated every bite. I lost 10 lbs those first 14 weeks.

But the physical discomfort was coupled with so much fear and doubt!! We found out we were pregnant the day the world shut down from COVID-19. So every doctors appointment had to be attended alone. Aaron wasn't allowed to be with me. I went into the ultrasound room for my 8 week appointment... the same room where I watched my other baby's heartbeat flicker away... and tried not to hyperventilate as I prayed it wouldn't happen again. Aaron wasn't there to hold my hand. Thankfully our baby was PERFECT! Strong heartbeat and perfect measurements. But that didn't take the fear away... honestly I didn't really feel settled and hopeful until after my 20 week ultrasound appointment where we were sure everything looked perfect. It was psychological warfare with every muscle ache or trip to the bathroom.

Eventually my nausea went away around 14 weeks, but I was now constantly uncomfortable - aches, pains, not able to breathe properly, heartburn, trips to the bathroom every hour... you name it! I just didn't like this pregnancy. And to top it off, because I had so much anxiety and fear, I really didn't connect with Hazel or feel bonded while I was carrying her. Even my favorite part of pregnancy - feeling her move - while reassuring of her health, wasn't exciting to me. I honestly worried a lot about how I would connect with Hazel when she arrived... it just was a really hard season. Pregnancy after miscarriage and during a pandemic with two other toddlers was HARD!

Ok... enough back story!

In the weeks leading up to Hazel's arrival, I was POSITIVE that she would come early. Cora arrived at 37 weeks and since this pregnancy felt very much the same as that one, I knew my body wouldn't last till the scheduled repeat C-section on November 19th. By 35 weeks I had EVERYTHING ready - hospital bag packed, bassinet set up, and everything I needed in place. Aaron had work stuff scheduled for right up until our scheduled c-section at 39 weeks, so his boss was hoping I wouldn't go into labor early. 37 weeks came and went and nothing was happening, so I figured I may actually make it all the way! 

At 37 weeks and 5 days (a Tuesday) I had an appointment with my doctor. She had checked me the week before and I was only 1cm, but since I was at risk for early labor she "didn't want to stir anything up" so she didn't check me again this time. Then she told me something every pregnant woman fears from her doctor - "I'll be out of town for 4 days starting Friday, so make sure she waits till Tuesday at least!" - I knew I was trying to hold off until the coming Thursday, but now I had to really pray Hazel didn't come over the weekend! I was so worried I would have to have a C-section from a doctor I had never met. Schwartz had delivered all my babies I couldn't even entertain the thought of her not delivering Hazel. I immediately called Aaron and told him to start praying, and then text our families and some friends to also pray! 


Fun irony - I remember having my last OB appointment with Cora on a Tuesday and then texting all my friends to pray she stayed in at least another week because Aaron and I had a friend's wedding and another friend's baby shower the coming weekend... Cora was born early the very next morning. So I was having major deja vu.

I went to sleep that night praying. I was so incredibly DONE being pregnant. Everything hurt. I daydreamed of being able to lay down, sit down, walk, stand still, or take a breath without discomfort more than I daydreamed about holding my baby girl. But I also didn't want Aaron to miss his meeting or have Schwartz not be available for my delivery.

I woke up a couple times that night to use the bathroom as usual, and as I was laying in bed falling back to sleep at 3:40am and I felt something pop in my lower abdomen. I had read so much about women sometimes being able to hear/feel their water break with a POP, but after 2 labors where my water broke in the middle of the night before contractions, I had yet to actually feel anything like that. I lay very still seeing if anything else happened and nothing did. After a couple minutes I just got up to use the bathroom and only a tiny bit of water came out. I was so confused! It hadn't felt like a baby kick, but I wondered if that was all it was. A couple minutes later I felt a BIG labor contraction and my water definitely broke! I got up and went to wake up Aaron.When he woke up and I told him what was happening he groaned and I thought he was upset about his meeting he was definitely going to miss. I quickly said "I'm so sorry, babe. I know this means you'll miss your meeting." He replied, "Oh no! It's not about the meeting. I just went to bed at 1am after playing video games and I really regret that!" We immediately started laughing. 

We immediately called Aaron's parents to come over and started gathering up the rest of our hospital bag stuff. I realized that Hazel was going to be born on Veterans Day and that made me happy - she would never have to go to school on her birthday! I suspected that this labor would move quicker than the other ones did and so I didn't want to delay too much. Pat and Laurie were over a little after 4am and we left by 4:30am. By then I was already have pretty intense contractions that were causing me to stop and grip a table or squeeze Aaron's hand. While we were driving the 30 min to the hospital, I was growling through each contraction that were 4 min apart. I really had not experienced contractions at this intensity. 


We got to the hospital a little after 5am and walked in and they took our temperature at the check in desk and asked us the typical COVID-19 questions about exposure, coughs, and fever symptoms. Aaron had to answer for me because I was leaning against the desk with my eyes squeezed tight trying to breathe through a contraction. I made it up the elevator and to the Maternity ward and then they checked us in to a triage room. They did my work up and I was already at 7cm dilated! I also was to the point where the contractions were the most painful I had ever experienced. With Will I had an epidural by the time I was at this point and then with Cora my lobar hadn't progressed enough before my C-section to feel this level of pain. It was insane! I got my IV, which was messy. It was actual a great IV placement wise, but I had blood all over my hand from it that I didn't even notice until I was holding Hazel over an hour later. The contractions were coming fast, so they actually ended up giving me medication to slow them down so Dr. Schwartz would have time to get to the hospital. The nurse giving me my IV made some sort of comment about how it would be so much better/easier if I could just deliver naturally and I considered yelling at her, but I was in the middle of a contraction and just couldn't be bothered. I know she meant well, but seriously lady... you don't know my story and why I have C-sections! 

I was doing so good with the contractions, trying to breath through them, trying not to swear too much, growling or squeezing the living daylights out of Aaron's hand instead. Then came the COVID test. They did it in between contractions, and IT. WAS. AWFUL! I mean I would have rated my contractions at a 9 and it was the COVID test that finally made me start crying! The nurse stuck the swab up my nose and swirled around in there and then when she took it back out I just burst into tears and said "That hurt really bad. That was so mean." I could see Aaron trying not to laugh through my tears and quite frankly I found the irony entertaining that a test so many had said wasn't that bad was what broke me down into tears. But with in a couple seconds after the swab was out a BIG contraction hit.

Then it was finally time to head to the OR! We got in there and the lovely anesthesiologist (same one I had when Cora was born) started my spinal blocker. Between my contractions being gnarly and the medication they gave me to slow my labor making me shake so bad, the injection process for him was a bit complicated. After it was in, he told me that some of the medication squirted out because I was shaking so much, so we had to wait a bit to make sure I was numb enough. We also had to wait a bit because while Dr Schwartz had arrived no problem, her surgical assistant wasn't going to make it in time. So we waited for another Dr. in the practice who "lived around the corner" from the hospital to arrive. I remember telling Schwartz while we waited that baby girl had heard she was heading out of town and didn't want her to miss her arrival!"Once the other doctor arrived to assist, Aaron came into the room too and they started the surgery.

The surgery went so smoothly! Since we had been through this process with Cora, we knew what to expect. Aaron knew where to stand to get pictures and I knew it would be a quick process from first cut to Hazel's first cry. We could hear little snippets from Dr. Schwartz like "I see her ear... baby is almost here!" And then I felt the push on my stomach and pressure and Hazel's first sounds! 


Aaron and I would reflect on this moment in the hospital room the next day. With Cora so much about that moment was redeeming from Will's birth. We both missed his first cry and his entry into the world (Aaron wasn't allowed in the OR for my emergency C-section and I was under general anesthesia). So when I heard Cora's first cries it was so overwhelming to hear our sweet girl's voice and also realize what we were truly missing when Will had arrived. 

For Hazel and her first cry, I was hit by the immense reality that the world has never heard that sounds before. It was so magical to be there the moment the world got Hazel Mae Kiva Mertz. She was born at 6:11am.

Soon after her first cry, I also heard "her cord is around her neck" It wasn't said with any alarm, so I tried not to freak out (and Hazel was making plenty of noise to prove she was just fine), and Schwartz clarified that the cord was draped around her neck like a necklace. I like to think that she came out "fancy". They then took her over to the table to weigh her and clean her up and I was anxious to get a look at her hair. She has a mop of brunette hair that was so precious! Not as dark as Cora's, but not as obviously red as Will's. She weighed in at 7 lbs and 6 oz, which was the exact birth weight as Cora! 


They wiped her down and then came over to lay her on my chest. It was just the best feeling. I'll confess with the hard pregnancy and the mental struggle with a pregnancy after miscarriage, I had wondered about that moment. Would I have the instant connection and love for her? As she lay on my chest, it was as overwhelming and instantaneous as it had been with Will and Cora... I was IN LOVE!

Aaron then held her the rest of the time as the surgical team put me back together. It was so wonderful to watch him rock and hold our precious new baby girl. It was also super entertaining that Hazel was already rooting around wanting to eat only 20 minutes into her life. Baby girl was hungry!





We left the OR and we were wheeled into the recovery room with me holding our precious Hazel. Since Hazel was born at 6:11am, it was around 7am when we got into recovery. I LOVED the recovery room with each of my babies. Especially Cora and now Hazel. Both were born early in the morning before the sun rose and so each time by the time we got to recovery, the sun was just rising and the soft light coming through the windows was magical. It also was so cozy. My body was still mostly numb from surgery and they had PILES of heated blankets over Hazel and me to regulate our temperatures. I got to nurse Hazel in recovery and she was a champ. I'm so thankful that all my babies were great at eating right away.


We eventually left recovery and went to our room right as the nurses were changing shifts. We got an awesome nurse right away! The hospital room was bright with the morning sun. I was finally able to sit up and position myself properly for a good look at Hazel. She was the spitting image of Will, only with slightly darker hair. I also instantly noticed her adorable and pronounced dimpled chin! Everyone who came into our room and saw her noted the cutest chin.

Right as we were settling into our room, Dr. Day (who is actually my kids' pediatrician) was the doctor rounding that morning from our practice. She big the first check up on our girl and Hazel was of course perfect!

The rest of our hospital stay was actually really nice. I always love our hospital stays. I don't have to get out of bed and everyone just brings me food, pain meds, and a snuggly baby. The hospital for at Scottsdale Shea is actually so good and I literally order my weight in food at every meal! I don't sleep great, but I slept the best this time compared to my other visits. I think this was because I had more down time than normal. With Will and Cora we had family stopping by to visit and meet our babies, but this time there were not visitors allowed, so we actually had stretches of time that were great for getting some sleep.




I should also mention that I did have to wear a mask upon checking in to the hospital (they helped tie it on me while I was breathing through a contraction) and throughout our hospital stay whenever someone came into our room, but no one really enforced it if the mask fell down or I just didn't have it on. I felt guilty, but not really guilty because I was so focused on Hazel and all the newness of her arrival, I honestly didn't remember half the time that I was supposed to have one on. A doctor or nurse or tech would come into the room to check on us and after they left I would suddenly realize I hadn't worn my mask at all. I mentioned it to the nurse and she told me that their ward was so separate from the rest of the hospital and I was tested and was negative for COVID, so they weren't very worried. They understood that with a new baby, it wasn't a big deal if we forgot our masks in the room. The nurses and doctors all wore masks to protect us though, but other than that everything seemed very normal and typical even amidst a pandemic.


Our Hazel girl started showing her fussiness the first day. Poor girl has a digestive system that just doesn't go easy on her, so she wanted to nurse almost constantly the first day for comfort. Aaron was the Hazel-whisperer though and when she was spiraling into piercing screams, he would walk and bounce with her and she'd settle down.

My surgery recovery actually went the best too! In the 2.5 years since I had Cora, they had changed the C-section recovery process and they had me up and walking in the half the time as before, which actually felt so much better to em! It helped with the stiffness and soreness I usually had. 

We went home as soon as we could though. With COVID, we didn't want to be in the hospital any longer than we needed to be, plus the kids were EAGER to meet their baby sister. We FaceTimed with them every day we were there and they just wanted to stare at "Hazie" and couldn't wait for us to bring her home to them. Will's first questions every time we called was "how is Hazie? Are you taking care of her? I'm so glad the doctor took her out of your tummy? How is your surgery doing?". At one point we were FaceTiming them while we had dinner and Will noticed the cake that came with our meal in celebration of our new baby and so he also was eager for me to get home so we could make a birthday cake for Hazel for him to eat too!



At this point, I don't know if Hazel will be my last birth story, but if she is I am so thankful to have ended with so much redemption, with so much joy, with so much love. She definitely makes the most perfect addition to our family. 

And if she isn't our last, it is because I can't get enough of the baby snuggles and the sweetness of these early moments and days!

Wednesday, April 11, 2018

Cora Jane Patricia Mertz (A Birth Story)...

This birth story is a story of redemption and healing in so many ways. If you want to understand the full extent of those ways, make sure to read my son's birth story in full here.

Here we go...

I'll start by saying that there is such a difference between preparing for your first baby and your second baby. When I was pregnant with Will, I had my hospital bag packed by 30 weeks, his nursery complete by 36 weeks, and my house perpetually clean in case he decided to come unexpectedly early. This time, by my 36 week appointment, I hadn't even had my baby shower yet and didn't have my suitcase down off the garage shelf. So I was in a bit of a panic when at my 36 week appointment my doctor, Dr. Schwartz, told me I was almost 3cm dilated and 60% effaced. She warned me I may want to have a plan in place in case Cora decided to come earlier than my planned c-section at 39 weeks (March 20th). Will was born exactly 1 day before his due date, so I was surprised at the idea of this one coming earlier than 1 week! I went home and scrambled to set up a bassinet, started throwing things into a suitcase, and made lots and lots of lists to prepare. 

One week later, for my 37 week appointment, I was checked again and hadn't progressed at all. My doctor also told me that Cora was as high up as she possibly could be, so I was confident that labor wasn't going to happen any time soon. I was so relieved and decided to set aside my feverish planning for the rest of the day and relax.

I remember that evening, as I was hobbling around the house uncomfortably 8 months pregnant, I had the thought that while I was glad Cora wouldn't be coming for a little while longer, I was so done being pregnant. But Aaron and I had a full week ahead of us with a few appointments for Will and then our friend's wedding and another friend's baby shower that weekend! I just kept thinking that if she did decide to come early, I just needed to make it to Monday and I would be more ready. I went to sleep that night completely confident that baby girl was staying where she was.

A little after 2am, I got up to use the bathroom and then crawled back into bed. As I was falling back to sleep I had a braxton hicks contraction like I normally did after any sort of activity. I rolled over to help it pass and as I did, my water broke. My first thought was to save our brand new mattress, and so I leapt out of bed saying, "oh my God, oh my God" over and over again. Aaron woke up with a jump and asked what had happened. I informed him my water had just broken and he immediately sighed in relief and said, "oh gosh, I thought something bad had happened like someone had broken in or Will was in danger!" I laugh now, but at the time was so annoyed that he didn't consider my water breaking to be something important!!! 

As my mind began to process the fact that I was actually in labor, I immediately felt so incredibly pissed! I was not ready to have this baby! It was too early! I only had a few items of clothing in the hospital bag and everything else was still spread around the house. Speaking of my house, it was a disaster because I have a toddler and little energy to pick up after him constantly. Aaron asked if I should call my doctor or if he should call his mom to come over. My response was, "I'm gonna take a shower." But, I did hand him my phone with the hospital bag lists so he could start gathering things up into the bag. When I was done with my shower I asked if he wanted to take a shower next. His response: "No, I'm ok, shouldn't we go?" My response: "eh, we're good. Take a shower." I had reached the full denial phase. There was still a piece of me that thought maybe it wasn't my water breaking (even though it clearly was). I moved at a glacial pace around the house gathering things and getting dressed. I just didn't want to fully acknowledge this was happening.

Pretty soon after my water broke, I felt my first contraction. With Will my contractions didn't start right away after my water broke and weren't painful at all until a few hours later. My contractions this time started right away and were strong enough for me to have to stop walking and pause for a second. This should have been motivation to get my butt in gear and go to the hospital, but my denial was more powerful. Finally when Aaron got out of the shower, I called my doctor and they told me to go to the hospital and when the hospital confirmed I was in labor, my doctor would head over for my c-section. Aaron called his mom to come over and be with Will. Laurie arrived about 10 min later at 3:30a and we left for the hospital. Not of course without me going into Will's room and standing over his crib quietly crying over the fact that I didn't get a proper goodbye cuddle and that this would be the last time I saw him when he was my only baby.

When I got in the car, I took a deep breath, cried a bit more and prayed that God would help me change my attitude and be on board for this all happening. I tried to let go of the fact that none of our family could be there to pray with us before the c-section or wait in the waiting room. I let go of my daughter's birthday not being March 20th - the first day of spring (I know that is a silly thing to grieve over, but I was so excited that she would be a true spring baby). I let go of not having a sibling gift for Cora to "give" Will when he met her. I let go of the fact that I was running on only 2.5 hours of sleep. Aaron and I prayed together and pretty quickly after I started getting excited to meet our little girl in just a few hours. We text the rest of our families to ask them to pray and to let them know that she was on her way!

We got to the hospital and I walked into our triage room at 4:03a. I remember this time because I was timing my contractions and they were pretty strong (about a level 5 pain wise) and about 8 min apart. Then we checked me in the triage room, I was already 6cm dilated and nearly fully effaced. This labor was progressing WAY faster than Will's did!

I wasn't sure what to expect having a repeat c-section, but having it be unexpectedly early. I didn't know how long we would have to wait. I actually was a little worried my doctor wouldn't be available to do the surgery! Thankfully as we settled into our triage room and I got hooked up to all the monitors, the nurse let me know that my doctor actually was already on her way to the hospital to deliver another patient who was fully dilated and ready to push. As soon as that patient was delivered, it would be time for my c-section! I was surprised it would be less than a couple hours until I delivered, but also relieved because my contractions were speeding up and getting a way more intense. Aaron and I were so thankful that everything was going so smoothly. It was actually so nice because there was never a moment at the hospital where we were waiting around with nothing to do. Nurses were coming in and out to check on me, finish my registration, and get my IV and fluids going. The anesthesiologist came in to let me know how everything would go in the OR. Then Dr. Schwartz came in and it was go time!! Not even an hour and 15 min after we arrived at the hospital, I was being rolled into the operating room.

Aaron and I were so amazed how incredibly different this experience was from Will's birth. For one thing, I was conscious and able to get out of my bed and walk to the OR table. Aaron wasn't able to come in with me right away and so I was alone with the medical team at the beginning. By the time I got into the OR my contractions were nearly on top of each other and I was squeezing the life out of Aaron's hand until we parted and then I just had the sides of the operating table to white knuckle while the pain was nearly unbearable. As I focused through each contraction, what sustained me was that very soon I would be getting a numbed from the naval down and that helped me get through! I got to the operating table and quickly got the numbing shot so they could put in the spinal needle to start my anesthesia. I was so thankful that as they laid me back on the operating table I could feel my feet going to sleep and the pain of my contractions going away.

As I lay back on the table, I remembered that my doctor had told me if I wanted skin to skin in the OR that I needed to let the nurse know. The hospital's policy was that a nurse had to take Cora right away to check her out at the baby station in the room before I could see her or do skin to skin. Luckily the table was going to be in my eye line the entire time and then after a minute or two, once they knew she was ok, I would be able to do skin to skin. As I lay flat on the table, I really couldn't see anyone else in the room except the anesthesiologist who was near my head, so I just said to the room at large that I wanted skin to skin. No one responded, but my anesthesiologist heard me and got the attention of the nurse and made sure she took note of my request.

Soon after, Dr Schwartz came into the OR and then they put up the sheet in front of my face and I started feeling them get me draped and situated. Aaron came in then and I was so thankful to see him. I had been warned that I would still be able to feel movement and pressure on my stomach and hips from them doing the surgery, but I wouldn't feel pain and this was definitely true. I could feel them press and pull and before I knew it the anesthesiologist let Aaron and I know that Cora would be born within the next minute! Seriously?! I couldn't believe how quickly that happened! I wasn't even sure they had made the first cut yet! The anesthesiologist (man, I wish I had remembered his name cause he was amazing) was the only person talking to us while every one else was intently focused on the surgery (rightfully so). He was so kind and let Aaron know the best place to stand to get the right view of her arrival. I felt them press down on the top of my stomach to "push" her out and then heard Schwartz declare, "There's her head!"...

And then I heard the most glorious sound!

Cora's sweet cry filled the room and I instantly started crying!

There was such a wave of redemption and a wave of grief all at once. So much of what I lost with Will and didn't get to experience in his birth was healed and redeemed in this moment, but I also had a wave of sadness now fully understanding what I missed with him. It was so incredibly bitter sweet, but definitely more sweet!

Schwartz handed Cora off to the nurse and I was so excited to get to have a clear view of her while the nurses wiped her down and checked her out. I couldn't stop smiling and ached to have her in my arms. I remember someone saying that she had a bit of hair and so when I saw her on the table I was actually quite shocked, because "a bit of hair" was an understatement! Our girl was born with a full head of adorably and surprisingly DARK hair! I had been picturing her having the same hair color as Will, so I was shocked beyond anything to see a raven haired little girl!

It was only about a minute and a half before they brought her over to me and she was on my chest. Oh my word, what an incredible feeling to hold her in my arms and see her only minutes old! I got to stare at her sweet face and take her in as they put my body back together. I can't actually tell you how long it took to close me up, but it probably was around 30-40 min. I didn't feel any of that time pass and it was as if Cora and I were in a completely separate world as we gazed at each other.

The anesthesiologist switched on my morphine drip and I was started getting a bit shaky and had to pass Cora off to Aaron. I thought holding her myself was a complete dream, but watching Aaron hold his daughter was equally magical! Aaron was born to be a dad and I knew that he would make an exceptional dad to a little girl! What a sweet moment to watch him take her in and walk around the room with her.

After each of us had gotten a good snuggle, we handed her back to the nurses and they continued checking her and weighed her in at 7lbs 6oz and she measured at 20in. Her head was 14in and therefore in the 86%. Schwartz informed me as we were leaving the OR that she was glad we did the C-section because it was very clear to her that Cora wouldn't have been born any other way due to her size and the shape and position of my pelvis. I didn't really care either way at that point, I only cared that she was in my arms.

I held her on the bed all the way to the recovery room, which was such a peaceful and sweet space for us to begin our time with her. The lights were dim and the room felt surprisingly cozy considering we were in a hospital surrounded by machines and medical equipment. They continued to monitor Cora and I and made sure we were doing ok. Both of our body temperatures were a bit low, so they put her on my chest and we did more skin to skin covered in warm blankets. I was still dealing with the shakiness of morphine, so a lot of the time was spent trying to relax as much as I could. Cora also had her first feeding. I had been nervous because Will was SUCH a champ at eating right away and I didn't want to expect that perfection again, but I was so happy that she took to it right away! She actually happily ate for over 30 min on each side! This was my first inkling that this girl LOVES to each, which is still true 5 weeks later.

The nurses shift change happened while we were in recovery, so we met a new nurse and then soon after we were moved into the room we would stay in for the rest of our hospital stay. I was able to properly sit up finally and I had stopped shaking, so I could really start to take her in and just stare at her! I just couldn't believe she was here and in my arms. It was 7:30a by the time we got to our room and I realized what a whirlwind I had been in since 2a! For the rest of the day, Aaron and I would look at the clock and try to remember where we had been in the midst of Will's labor at that time vs. our life with Cora.
It was interesting because my labors with both kids had started almost at the exact same time (1:30a and 2a respectively). With Will at 7:30a I was still walking the halls waiting for my contractions to get strong enough, and this time with Cora, she was here and we were already comfortably tucked into our little hospital room relaxing.

I had started my labor with a lot of anxiety and frustration that my plans had been thwarted and thinking about all the things that I wasn't able to control. But as I stared at my sweet girl in my lap, none of it mattered. She was perfect and safe and healthy and just the sweetest and sleepiest little bundle of love.





Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Will's Seventh Month! 8/11 - 9/10

7 MONTHS OLD!! • I love moving all over the place and don't
like being still (hence the picture) • my mom and dad thought our
house was baby proof, but I have a knack for finding danger •
I can now army crawl, get myself into the sitting position, and
I have pulled myself up to standing once now • I have one tooth
and the second one is on its way • June now steers clear of me
cause I have pulled h
er tail one too many times, but she gets a
few face and hand licks in after each meal time to get the
extra food off me • I love watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse in
 bed with mama in the mornings • I love singing and when my
 mom claps for me • I love when dad carries me around the
house in the ergo • I love my new van • there is not a food I
have tried so far that I can't stand, but green beans are low on my
favorites list • I prefer eating squash, apples, pears, and carrots! •
I love that I am getting to take walks outside more often
in the mornings • my favorite book the the Jabberwocky •
my favorite toy is my play school ring tower! •
my favorite song is still Winnie the Pooh. • Being 7 months old is so fun!

Well we started on this 7th month of life at a sprint... or most honestly at a crawl! Yes, our little nugget, having just barely mastered the art of sitting up decided that it wasn't enough for him anymore and he needed to start scooting! It was starting to become more imperative to him when his toys would be just out of reach and he just NEEDED them and couldn't wait to momma to move them closer. I had been noticing some tiny inches of movement here and there and definitely some good rolling skills to get where I wanted. But, one day while we were playing on the ground, Will caught sight of my phone and just HAD to have it. This was the motivation he needed to do some proper scooting!


There was no stopping after this and it seemed like time sped up by 100x and I don't know how I am supposed to keep up. Gone are the days of being able to put him down and he would stay in the same place. Gone are the days of tummy time and you being content to lay on your back and just stare at my face. You are a mover my sweet boy and you never stop! Will's weight percentile actually went down recently because, according to our pediatrician, is "one of the more active 6 month olds I've ever met." Lucky me!

But actually this new stage of moving had brought out one of my favorite personality traits Will has and that is his curiosity! He wanted to know and discover and explore EVERYTHING! I began the process of really baby proofing the house and Will was ever so helpful at constantly letting me know areas I had missed. It took a couple months to finally be able to relax in the house and know that he was safe (as long at the bathroom and laundry room doors were shut and June's food was up on the counter).







there are outlet protectors on there, they are just clear
As if crawling and scooting weren't enough, Will also started solid foods! No more being able to eat only momma's milkies. The amount of moving he was doing called for a lot more calories. We started on rice cereal as usual and then slowly began to introduce new foods. Will loved everything we gave him... except green beans, which he didn't like, but would still eat.







This month we had a VERY special visitor! Auntie Carla came to visit us all the way from London, England! I was so incredibly excited for her to be here with us and to meet my little man. She brought Will a little Oxford bear since she was starting her teach certification program there in the fall. Will was enamored with her and they were best friends instantly!



It was a short visit and had such a crazy beginning to it! She was initially supposed to be able to stay 10 days, but then a couple months before her trip, her parents got an opportunity to go to Chicago for a conference and decided to bring Carla's little sister Candace with them. Since Candace is only 8 years old, Carla decided to reroute her trip to Chicago for the first 3 days to watch her sister during the conference. Sadly the airline she was flying wouldn't let her change her destination to Chicago, so she ended up keeping her flight to Phoenix and back, but then buying another ticket from Phoenix to Chicago almost immediately. This meant that she was going to fly into Phoenix one night and then immediately fly to Chicago early the next morning. Well with unexpected flight delays in Toronto, it meant that she ended up having to fly directly to Chicago and there was a ton of drama to try to get her tickets to stay valid even though she missed some of her legs. It was so incredibly stressful for her and ended up throwing the whole point of the relaxing vacation into a frenzy. By the time she finally did make it to Phoenix, she was utterly exhausted from the flight drama and caring for an 8 year old for 3 days stuck in a hotel. Needless to say, our time was about relaxing and sitting on the couch watch suits, talking, crying, processing, laughing and enjoying the joy Will created with us!

We had a party for Carla to welcome her with a bunch of people. I sadly didn't take very many pictures, but managed to catch a photo of Carla with Bruce and Janet, who she absolutely loves. Every time she visits she wants to make sure to see them as they were so sweet and intentional with her at our wedding.



My mom, got these photos on her phone from the party. Right before the picture of my dad holding Will with my mom was taken, my mom simply asked my dad if she wanted to take a picture with her and Will. My dad smiled and said, "sure!" and reached out to hold Will! This was the first time my dad ever held my son! I was nearly shaking taking the picture, I was so excited! It is one of my favorite photos of all time. The moment I was done taking the picture, my dad handed him back to my mom and the moment was gone. But I am so thankful for this picture.



Carla noted how different my dad was even from her last visit a year and a half before. It was hard and so sad for her to see his progression. I sometimes don't really stop and take in how much he has changed in the long term. It is easy just to notice the subtle and slow changes from week to week.

During Carla's visit, we also did a day trip up to the Mogollon Rim for the day to escape the heat and show her some beautiful Arizona scenery!







It sprinkled as we walked along the rim trail and we just talked and processed life all together. Aaron was able to get the day off work to go up with us and it was so nice to have him with us as we hung out.

Then before we knew it, she was off to return home! It seems each of her trips makes it so much harder for us to part and continue to do life so far away! Thankful for social media and video chats to keep us connected.





With San Diego and Carla's visit behind us, we got back to normal life again and Will just kept growing and changing! He continued eating all the fun new foods we were introducing him to and just grew life a little weed. He had been a little extra fussy and a restless sleeper while Carla was here and I chalked it up to probably being thrown off by a visitor in the house, but as soon as Carla left, I discovered Will had cut his first tooth at some point in the week! No wonder our little man was so sad! I actually was a bit impressed though, because I had expected much worse for a baby cutting their first tooth. He was mild considering what I had pictured.

One of Will's favorite things to do is read books and one book series I am obsessed with for him is the Babylit books! He has a ton of them and we love them! They are board book primers that are based on classic literature! Will's favorite is the Jabberwock, but I also love the Pride & Prejudice counting primer and the Jungle book animal primer. They also have books on cities around the world and the national parks! Since the National Parks were celebrating 100 years on August 25th, I had to do a little photo shoot of Will and one of his favorite books.






Oh this kid is getting so photogenic! He makes the absolute perfect expressions and I can't get over how animated he is. So the photoshoots just kept on coming this month!

We did a little photoshoot with the mommy and me Robin Hood set Nicole gave us for Christmas since Will finally fit in his! I had a vintage Robin Hood lunchbox that was a great prop.




One of my favorite photos of him ever!



Will also got more play time with little friends. We had a play date with Caleb and Livi! Livi is just a couple months older than the boys, so I can't wait to see them all together in Sunday school at church and growing up together. Livi, being the only little girl, had the boys literally chasing (crawling) after her and she was so sweet to give them hugs.





My Mamaw's 92nd birthday was on August 27th, so we made a special visit to her to celebrate! Will loved seeing her again and she even sang him the lullaby she wrote that my mom sang to me and I sing to Will every night. They are so sweet together.






Before we knew it, we were in September! Cooler temps were just weeks away now and I was dreaming of playing outside again. It also was Aaron and my 5 year dating anniversary, so we decided to take Will out to dinner to celebrate all we had done and accomplished in 5 years since dating!


September also meant the beginning of College Football season and Daddy & Will Saturday mornings watching the Georgia Bulldogs! One of Aaron's co-workers had given us the cutest University of Georgia onesie set when Will was born and it was the perfect size for this season!






Like I said... so many photoshoots!

Labor day weekend is our Church's yearly family weekend up North in Payson at Mountain Meadows Ranch, and is a great excuse to get out of the Phoenix heat. We weren't ready to stay overnight and camp with everyone else, so we just headed up for the Sunday that was our big all church day. It was so lovely to let Will be outside in the cool fresh air and take in the forest scenery. We hung out with the Stoops' and other friends, so Caleb got to play with his little friends and cousins. We also got sweet pictures with Grandma & Grandpa. Aaron and Will and I took a walk along the creek while Will was asleep on me. This was the Summer camp that Aaron and I grew up going to with church summer camp. It was so sweet to be able to walk some of my favorite walks and remember having a crush on Aaron as camp there in High School and now to be walking around with him as my husband and with our little baby.







Will had been rocking at all his crawling and sitting up as the month went on, but we reached another fun milestone right before he reached 7 months where he was able to get into the sitting position on his own. I had been excited about this achievement because he often wanted to be sitting up and I had to be constantly available to help him get there if he'd fallen over or tried to crawl. One day I went into his room to get him up from his nap when he called out to find him happily and proudly sitting up!


And then within a couple days he took it one step further and started being able to pull himself up in his crib.


I was so proud of my little boy and so excitement for this new accomplishment. He too was so excited and loved trying out his new tricks. Sadly, he liked trying them out in the middle of the night when he was half asleep and then would wake himself up all the way and have trouble getting back to sleep. Will had been an awful night sleeper since Mother's Day, which was the last time he slept through the night, but was getting so close to getting better after some sleep training. Sadly this derailed him completely and he went back to waking up many times.

To finish off Will's 7th month, we finally decided it was time to upgrade our family vehicle and get a van! I was SO EXCITED! Aaron found us a great deal on a used 2008 Kia Sedona. I was so excited to be able to fit a ton of more stuff and ready for all the family road trips! Will too loved his new wheels and being able to see out the window better!




Between visitors, trips out of town, cutting his first tooth, trying baby food, sitting up on his own and standing, this kid had a pretty awesome and eventful month!!

more food!



When Will wouldn't nap, mom would get cranky

More Georgia Bulldog swag!

Go Dawgs!

falling asleep in the middle of morning playtime with daddy



trying more food

We tried out a movement and dance and reading time for little kids at church,
but Will might have been too small and overwhelmed. 

playing with the baby in the mirror


politely waiting for dinner

he was so excited any time he was ready to eat

hanging out by the back door because it's too hot to go outside

bath time

my two grumpy boys


all the foods


Saturday mornings are game time! Go Dawgs!